Thursday, July 23, 2009

Livenation: You suck balls.

Dear Livenation,

You just charged me a 5 dollar surcharge on a cash purchase. What the fuck is that shit? Your shows are not nearly good enough to warrant that and your crappy venues are even worse. I'm pretty sure you're why people aren't spending the money on concert tickets and more independent promoters are doing better than you. And that is why you suck balls.

Sincerely,
Mitch.

Sunday, July 19, 2009

Warped, Smarped.

Warped Tour is probably one of the most iconic "festivals" in the United States. Probably in the world. It happens every year, without fail, for the last, I think, 15 years now. That's pretty impressive. We have these other mediocre festivals like Lollapalooza and Bonarroo. But.... That shit is for kids who smoke weed and dance around naked to crappy hippy music. Just kidding. Good bands play at both Lollapalooza and Bonarroo, but they're not the same sort of ethos as Warped.

Warped Tour started in 1995, I think (So I would have been right with my 15 year guesstimate) and encompassed the idea of people coming together for one thing: music. Kevin Lyman, Warped founder, got the idea after working on some skate festivals and magazines, so, he took the idea and ran with it as a day for kids who skate and BMX to come, chill in scorching hot weather in the middle of fucking summer, and listen to some hot jamz by their favorite punk rawk bands. 1995 was punk as shit, featuring the Deftones, Guttermouth, Face to Face, and Quicksand. Eventually bands like Rancid, noFX, and Propaghandi joined (And left) the tour due to conflicts of interest between bands play and what have you.

In recent years, we've all heard the drama around noFX's Fat Mike and UnderOATH. Fat Mike called them a bunch of douches because of their stance on gay marriage and something of that douche tastic nature. Eventually they both said they were friends and had civilized discussions about it..... okay? Cool. I guess? Whatever. Anyways, the tour has decreased in "popularity" among the real punk dudes that got their start on the tour. Broadway Calls (A band on Adeline records, you know, that label Billie Jo from Green Day started with his wife, who are strangely enough kind of poppy?) said the following: "When there are 60 bands a day, and a majority of them are made up of either Christian jocks that play REALLY HEAVY MUSIC for Jesus, or pop bands with the only thing separating them from boy bands like Backstreet Boys are their dropped D tuned guitars hanging from their shoulders, it's hard to be comfortable. I look around, and quickly realize that the only difference between this and a huge frat party is that all these idiots play music. Bad music. Unfuckinglistenable music."

(This is where my op-ed starts.)

Those dudes are totally right. I went to Warped Tour last summer because there were some bands I genuinely wanted to see. But instead of it being a bunch of pop punk kids (yeah, I'm one of them. Fuck you, blink-182 and 90's Green Day will ALWAYS fucking rule. so will hit the light's first record. and new found glory. shut it) and aging punks, I had to nagivate a sea of prepubescent little girls in booty shorts with sideways haircuts. Oh. And the little 12 year old boys in girls pants and extra baggy t shirts and new era 51/50's that are a size too large with stupid ass scene haircuts and massive gauges. That's not cool. I mean, granted, yeah, I was there in a white shirt and skinny jeans, but let's face it.... There was never a day where I dressed like that. I never knew any girls in booty shorts either. Whatever, back on topic. It was discouraging to see people flood the stage for bands like All Time Low and The Maine. First off, All Time Low's mini-LP Put Up Or Shut Up was pretty decent in terms of 3rd wave pop punk. And The Maine's first EP The Way We Talk was catchy. I won't deny that. I like pop music, I grew up on doo-wop and motown. I have a soft spot for pop and I listen to it critically like I do all other forms of music. I know when it sucks and when it's not too bad. Whether it's written by some fat fuck in an office or the band themselves, it doesn't really matter. They did something right and it deserves some sort of merit.

But my point is this. There were bands who are really the roots and the bread and butter of Warped Tour, like The Bouncing Souls, Stick To Your Guns [Newer band, but same Boston straight edge punk-ness of some early bands], Pennywise, Bad Religion (Although, I don't think they played the '08 tour), and noFX (Same as Bad Religion, I don't think they played '08). That is the real Warped Tour. The addition of bands like The Academy Is..., Anberlin, Say Anything (I actually really like this band alot, so, I can't trash them), Katy Perry, Paramore, Relient K, and whoever else, is discouraging for kids like me. Who the fuck wants to see Katy Perry to begin with? It's not even like she's good to look at. And Paramore is fine, I mean, sure, cute 19 year old girl listens to hardcore (Every time I see pictures she's in some H20 or Madball shirt. And she married Chad Gilbert of New Found Glory who was in Shai Halud and Burry Your Dead. So). But Relient K? Really? Kids go to Warped Tour now to watch half assed bands play half assed songs that are autotuned. Anthony Ranieri of Bayside said something about this recently that I read on absolutepunk.net I think (lol at that since they rep all these mediocre bands quite frequently, but who am I to talk?). If you go to Warped Tour to see some shit ass band that the label "found" doens't make you punk. Take your gauges out, take off your sisters old jeans, and go back to private school.

Friday, July 17, 2009

Mixy Maxy Mishy Mashy.

The age old art of making someone elses words yours. It's been done since Shakespeare wrote fucking Romeo and Juliet. Alas, what window yonder light breaks? Good Night, Good night! Parting is such sweet sorrow, that I shall say good night till it be 'morrow. We know the game well. And by we, I mostly mean those of us who are the heart torn, love sick, lovelorn, broken hearted ones. Mostly me. But hey, I know there's more of my contemporaries out there. Rob Gordon (John Cusack) said it the best, "People worry about kids playing with guns, or watching violent videos, that some sort of culture of violence will take them over. Nobody worries about kids listening to thousands, literally thousands of songs about heartbreak, rejection, pain, misery and loss." (High Fidelity) Who knew that it was really the case? Sure as shit wasn't me.

A few months... And I mean like 5 months ago, on Valentines Day, I wrote a similar essay in which I talked about the importance of misery, song writing, and what makes a great song. Not a good song. But a great song. And now, we have a collection of these great songs. And a person who is not only great. But one such person who well read, intelligent, funny, and good looking to ice the proverbial cake. Now... We're fucked. We, the lovelorn, heartsick ones, now cannot proclaim our love/admiration. How can we? The last girl I asked out I somehow managed to choke the words out in between a flurry of deafening heart beats in my head and the radio blasting in the background. Some people write letters. Some people write songs. Others, and I've done this as well, make a mix tape.

Ahhh, yes, the mix tape. The black abyss of love and hurt. The only reason I'm even writing this fucking article is that I'm in the process of making one myself. For a girl (whoa, surprise, who knew!? me, jackass). There are rules. Very important rules. You have to start your tape with a killer, killer track. But if you make it too good, you're done for. Then you have to back it off because you don't want to say all you have to say by 6 minutes into side a of your tape.... Errr.... 6 minutes of your CD-R. Each "side" needs to end on a huge note. Everything needs to be fluid. It can't be thrown together. It's an art. It takes forever. It takes me a week or so to get a great first draft done. And that's even pushing it.

The mix tape defines that moment. That one single, solitary moments of all moments that we never seem to realize pass by until they're long gone. And once they're gone... They're totally gone. You know what I'm talking about, don't you? If you didn't, I'd be shocked, to be honest. I'm entirely entranced by this girl. She's all of the above (I mean like four paragraphs above) and therefore demands a tape made in her honor. I keep them all, as a memoir of love lost and gone. The memories are still there whether or not they ended well or not. Live and learn.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

The Smiths were never really a band I believed I truly liked until I received my high school diploma and then it all suddenly made sense. There's something beautifully haunting about Morrissey's voice as he croons you into your sweet wanna-be-veganism/celibacy. Yes, Morrissey was celibate for a short period of time. You can't write songs about heart break, misery, and sex if you're celibate. You have no frame of reference for those things other that in the past and let's face it...... Those memories are always going to be distorted. Or so science says. But fuck science, that shit is for the birds, dudebroski.

I was in love with the Smiths a few months ago (now closer to a year) and I had lost my touch until I heard the recent cover (Please, Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want) that Zooey Deschancel destroys (Because her voice is that of a seraph [Deal with the vocab]). I should also note that M. Ward, her partner in indie-folk stardom/indie-folk star of his own fame, totally destroys Marr's guitar parts. The song is made from being the typical Manchester pop-rock/new-wave-y upbeat jangle to being hauntingly empty; drenched in reverb and delay. To wrap up this little She & Him promo (As I await, along with the legion of fans they have farmed for themselves), Zooey and M. (errr, Matt, but does anyone call him Matt?), have an amazing sense for what they need to do to a cover song to really make it great (See the Vol. 1 covers of Smokey Robinson's 'You Really Got A Hold On Me' and The Beatles' 'I Should Have Known Better').

Now, we all know the Smiths were all over the world for the brief history they had as a band (It would seem that many great bands only last a few years. With the exceptions of "great" [Via context] bands like the Rolling Stones, etc [Don't get me wrong, I appreciate that music, but the style is static and it sounds dated now], great music occurs in short bursts. The Smiths were around from 1982 through 1987 and released a mere 4 albums (Including like some 19 singles and a few random non LP occurances). That's far less than even a band like The Beatles (Who probably a had a greater effect on society due to years active and the state of the music industry then), but still leaves me wondering how a band who released four records would be able to really jump start a scene that would give birth, in my opinion, to the early roots of bands like The Promise Ring. Perhaps not greatly, but, I can see where people, like The Promise Ring's Davey Von Bohlen, would and could pull influence from.

None the less, I guess, The Smiths rule.

Playlist for 7-14-09

banterbanterbantersongbanterbantersongbanterbanter. SNAPE KILLS DUMBLEDORE. banterbanterbantersongbanterbantersongbanterbanter. BURLY DUDES. banterbanterbantersongbanterbantersongbanterbanter. BURLY

Deer TickLittle White LiesBorn On Flag Day
MegafaunKaufman's BalladGather, Form & Fly
Elvis PerkinsAll Night Without LoveAsh Wednesday
Emily BateSuits Me FineSplit with Dave End
Conor Oberst & Gillian WelchLuaDark Was The Night
Iron & WineMorningAround The Well
Kevin DevineA Billion BeesPut Your Ghost To Rest
She & HimPlease, Please, Please Let Me Get What I WantInternetz
Zee AviFirst Of The Gang To DieZee Avi
Youth GroupShadowlandSkeleton Jar
Frightened RabbitGood Arms vs Bad ArmsThe MIdnight Organ Fight
VAGINA PANTHERI Bet You There Are Some Burly Dudes On That ShipVagina Panther
Conor OberstSouled Out!!!Conor Oberst
Those Darlin'sSnaggle Tooth MamaThose Darlin's
Ditty BopsBye Bye Love

MegafaunWorried MindGather, Form & Fly
C'est La VieCoralie ClementToystore
La Meme HistorieElisabeth AnaisParis, Je T'ame
Neko CaseI'm An AnimalMiddle Cyclone
Maria TaylorCartoons and Forever PlansLadyluck
Bright EyesAt The Bottom of EverythingI'm Wide Awke It's Morning
Camera ObscuraFrench NavyMy Maudlin Career
Broken RecordsIf The News Makes You Sad, Don't Watch ItUntil The Earth Begins To Part
The Gaslight AnthemThe '59 SoundThe '59 Sound

Playlist for 7-7-09

Dudes, I have no idea why I'm so lazy with these now.

Conor Obes and the Mystic Valley BandNikoretteOuter South
God Help The GirlCome Monday NightGod Help The Girl
God Help The GirlThe Music Room WindowGod Help The Girl
Algernon CadwalladerCasual Discussion In A Dome Between Two TemplesSome Kind Of Cadwallader
BibioJealous Of RosesAbivilance Avenue
Grizzly BearTwo WeeksVeckatimest
Matt & KimDaylightGrand
Ella Ja AleksiHuhuu Kuha PuhuuTalventorrottajat
Camera ObscuraCarless LoveMy Maudlin Career
SleepercarA Broken PromiseWest Texas
Conor OberstSausilitoConor Oberst
Conor OberstGet-Well-CardsConor Oberst
Ben KwellerSundressBen Kweller
M. WardFisher Of MenHold Time
Bon IverBeach BabyBlood Bank EP
MaritimeGuns of NavaroneHeresey And The Hotel Choir
RoyksoppHappy Up HereJunior
Tom BrosseauFavorite Color BluePostumous Success
Asobi SeksuSing Tomorrow's PraiseHush
Bright EyesEasy/Lucky/FreeDigital Ash in A Digital Urn
CursiveI Couldn't Love YouMama, I'm Swollen
The FaintSouthern Belles In London SingWet From Birth
The Get Up KidsClose To MeEudora
The Beta BandDry The RainThree EPs
Those Darlin'sDUI Or DieThose Darlins
Peggy SueMilk And BloodLover Gone EP
Tiny VipersSlow MotionLife On Earth
Joan of ArcFogbowFlowers

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Playlist for 6-30-09

Sooo, I forgot to put this up when the show happened. Sorry d00dz.

Those Darlin'sMama's HeartThose Darlin's
The Terrible Two'sCarolineIf You Ever See An Owl...
God Help The GirlFunny Little FrogGod Help The Girl
Deer TickLittle White LiesBorn On Flag Day
Bright EyesAt The Bottom Of EverythingI'm Wide Awake It's Morning
CurisveFrom The HipsMama I'm Swollen
Conor Oberst and the Mystic Valley BandTen WomenOuter South
The Rural Alberta AdvantageRush ApartHometowns
Neko CaseThis Little LightThe Tigers Have Spoken
The Tallest Man On EarthThe GardnerShallow Graves
She & HimI Thought I Saw Your Face TodayVolume 1
God Help The GirlGod Help The GirlGod Help The Girl
DM StithBe My BabyBMB EP
The ExtraordinairesEllis IslandElectric and Benevolent
Jenny LewisCarpetbaggersAcid Tongue
M. WardSangri-LaHold Time
The SmithsThere Is A Light That Will Never Go OutThe Queen Is Dead
MaritimeTearing Up The OxygenWe, The Vehicles
Ben GibbardThrillerUnknown
Elisabeth AnaisLa Mem HistorieParis Je T'Aime
Coralie ClementL'Effet JokariToystore
Elliott SmithBottle Up and ExplodeXO
EluviumPrelude For Time FeelersCopia
Deer TickFriday XIIIBorn On Flag Day
Tiny VipersDreamerLife On Earth
OwenBad NewsAt Home With
American FootballNever MeantAmerican Football
Iron & WineMorningAround The Well
It Hugs BackBack DownInside Your Guitar
Great NorthernHousesRemind Me Where The Light Is